I’ve noticed that in a lot of cases, the 4th place finisher is someone who probably deserved to be eliminated weeks ago. They’ve usually redeemed themselves in some way because there have been multiple photoshoots in which to do so. They’re almost always mildly entertaining, as if the judges are keeping them around to wreak havoc (since they tend to have bitchy tendencies too) up until the final episode. And I’m usually desperately in love with the contestant, even if nobody else is. 

Cycle 1’s Robin Manning:

Her most famous moments: Praying for Ebony after a fight broke loose in the house, prompting Ebony to give that infamous eye roll at the camera. She’ll also be remembered for refusing to do the second to last shoot (along with Shannon), a nude shoot, but then shaking her boobs at Mr. Jay, resulting in her elimination.

Bitch?: More like overly judgmental religious zealot. 

Entertaining?: She was! Although with the altogether more normal Adrianne and Elyse, I’m unsure about how necessary she was.

Could she model?: She had rare moments (like the one above) where she could, but overall, she was too old and too thick to realistically be a model. 

Cycle 2’s April Wilkner:

Her most famous moments: Melting down basically every week when she felt she didn’t do the best. She’s one of the least insane members of the 4th place club.

Bitch?: Nope. Probably one of the least bitchy people in cycle 2. Not that that’s saying much.

Entertaining?: In the scheme of things….? No. Not really. She was fun to watch because she was usually on top of her game. Her commentary on the whole Shandi fuckfest was also cute.

Could she model?: You bet your ass she could. Easily the strongest Asian model the show has had… Her best shot alone trumps anything Gina and Sheena did combined.

Cycle 3’s Ann Markley:

Her most famous moments: Oh, where to start? Landing in the bottom 2 a bajillion times and ousting Leah, Kelle, Toccara and Norelle is certainly one of them. In the first episode alone, Ann cemented her claim as ‘hilarious bitch’ by telling everyone to go fuck themselves when she and Eva didn’t get a room together, and then sobbing about how she wanted Eva to be at her wedding and wanted Eva to win the competition. Then, many weeks later, she told Eva off for being two-faced and didn’t hug her goodbye after her elimination. 

Bitch?: What do you think? The top 4 all had their moments, but Ann was probably the most psychotic. The whole ‘always in the bottom 2’ thing had to be hard on her already dwindling psyche.

Entertaining?: You know…. after the whole episode 1 thing… Not really. She whined a lot, and the thing with Eva was sad, since Eva had been totally redeemed by good editing at that point.

Could she model?: On the show? Questionable. Off the show? You bet your ass. She’s one of the more successful ANTM alumni… Her post-show work is gorgeous. 

Cycle 4’s Brittany Brower:

Her most famous moments: Screeching SHAAADAAAAAAAPPPP at Keenyah, pounding martinis at a party, being told she was too sexy and over the top and then getting eliminated for toning down her sexual side, being the only person who managed to do well on the cold read.

Bitch?: In general? Not really. The whole Keenyah thing was a little over the top, but someone had to do it.

Entertaining?: Dear god, YES. That top 5 was the most snooze-inducing group they’ve ever had with the exception of her. I would have shot myself if she hadn’t been around.

Could she model?: She’s my favorite from Cycle 4… and she hasn’t done a ton since the show ended, but she could rock it if she wanted to.

Cycle 5’s Jayla Rubinelli:

Her most famous moments: Stealing Nik’s secret at a photoshoot for Secret deodorant and then her scary confessional about Nik being a ‘stupid, stupid bitch’ because Nik was pissed about it.

Bitch?: Ohhhhh yes. 

Entertaining?: More like uncomfortable, seeing as how she acted like a ticking time bomb about to explode.

Could she model?: Absolutely. She was sabotaged on the show, but she has the post-show work to prove that she had something. I have always loved her, through the bitching.

Cycle 6’s Sara Albert-

Her most famous moments: Bitching about her new ‘cockatiel’ haircut, copying Joanie’s poses from the elephant photoshoot.

Bitch?: No, not at all. She and April lead the ‘sanity’ club for the 4th place finishers.

Entertaining?: Not really. She got a glowing edit in episode 1, after the above picture, but she quickly fell back as Jade’s (amazing) reign of terror took over.

Could she model?: Of course…. She was 6’1 and looked like Scarlett Johansson. She wasn’t the best model in the bunch, but she definitely had the tools to be sucessful.

Cycle 7’s Amanda Babin:

Most entertaining moments: Being one of the ‘twins’ is her most notorious moment on the show, although her recap episode footage when she shouted at Monique about food was gold.

Bitch?: Nope, not that we saw.

Entertaining?: The twins were sort of boring, to be honest. They both could model, but they weren’t very interesting.

Could she model?: She could! And apparently she can string a sentence together too, since she has a role in some low budget horror movie. Not saying she’s an actress, but she can spit lines out! Go Amanda!

Cycle 8’s Dionne Walters:

Her most famous moments: Beating Brittany despite two clearly inferior photos, Wholahay, ‘What the fuck is wrong with my babies hair’, ‘Hold up… I’m not no fucking lesbo!’, ‘I don’t even kiss my damn boyfriend’. She’s one of the funniest contestants ever.

Bitch?: She had her moments, but I don’t think she was that bad.

Entertaining?: Absolutely. She and Natasha made Cycle 8.

Could she model?: Questionable. She’s a pretty girl, but she got lucky in that there were people like Whitney who sucked every shoot, saving her from scrutiny.

Cycle 9’s Bianca Golden:

Her most famous moments: Fighting with Lisa about how America’s Next Top Model wasn’t ‘going to be no exotic dancer’… Fighting with Saleisha: ‘Check yo thighs out in the mirrah… And I’m done!’, picking on Heather every episode, charming the pants off the judges, crying when she had her head shaved (the best thing that could have happened to her), telling Jenah to go across the street to find outfits for a challenge despite knowing that it was an empty lot.

Bitch?: Some say she’s one of the bitchiest ever. I disagree. I think she was a bitch, no doubt… But she had enough moments where she looked genuinely happy for me to know that she wasn’t all miserable muck inside, like say…. Monique from C7?

Entertaining?: I thought she was. Her fight with Saleisha is awesome because she picked up on Saleisha’s unfair place in the competition from day 1.

Could she model?: Her face is awesome. Nobody else looks like her. Clearly, the fashion industry agrees with me… She’s done runway and print and is more successful than her more beloved Cycle 9 counterparts Heather and Jenah.

Cycle 10’s Dominique Reighard-

Her most famous moments: Her Covergirl commercial in Italian and the infamous BRAZILIA line, fighting with Whitney and accusing her of being racist, eating in the middle of the night, her horrible outfits that she wore to panel, Miss. J using his drag voice when critiquing most of her shots.

Bitch?: Everyone in Cycle 10 was chemically imbalanced except for Anya. I would say that yes, she was a bitch, but not the worst of the lot.

Entertaining: Without a doubt…. She made Cycle 10 funny as hell.

Can she model?: Well… that depends. If she turns up the drag, her pictures are pretty damn terrible… but if she can soften her face, she does well. She won that stupid spinoff, Modelville, so she can clearly do something right.

Cycle 11’s Marjorie Conrad:

Her most famous moments: Fighting with Samantha and Sheena about how being European makes you different, constantly melting down at the drop of a hat, her ‘vajayjay shaving party’ with Analeigh, getting drunk in Amsterdam and getting into the hot tub, fully clothed, with some male models.

Bitch?: Not at all.

Entertaining?: Incredibly! I loved how twitchy she was. 

Could she model?: CAN SHE MODEL?! She’s quite possibly one of the most high fashion girls that ANTM ever saw. Photographically, she’s even better than McKey, who is my favorite winner.

Australia’s Next Top Model Cycle 1 Samantha Morley-

Her most famous moments: Freaking out about shooting with a spider, wearing a see through dress to a horse racing show. 

Bitch?: Not really… She was sort of Melrose-ish in that she was very confident, but she seemed more determined than bitchy.

Entertaining?: That cycle was pretty boring… Not gonna lie.

Could she model?: Yeah, I think so. She reminds me of Alex from Cycle 4 of Australia.

C2’s Madeleine Rose-

Her most famous moments: Being the girl to replace Sasha (the girl eliminated before even getting to the house), making out with Sophie in the hot tub and trying to have sex with Lara all in the first episode…. She also made out with the stylist on the circus freak shoot, got into a fight with two Australian football players and cuddled with another stylist. 

Bitch?: Sort of… She was very over the top and abrasive at times, but she wasn’t heinous.

Entertaining: Um… duh?

Could she model?: Absolutely. She was later in Harpers Bazaar and took some of the best shots in Cycle 2.

C3’s Anika Salerno:

Her most famous moments: Her boobs, mostly. She wore some hella unflattering outfits to panel.

Bitch?: Nope, not at all. 

Entertaining?: Not really. 

Could she model?: Yup, in spite of her massive cans, she took some really lovely pictures. She had to go against Alice Burdeu, queen of all top model contestants, which obviously didn’t make her stint easy, but she’s one of my favorites from Cycle 3.

C4’s Caris Eves-

Her most famous moments: Struggling with fitness but delivering week after week, her fear of heights during the Mary Kyri shoot.

Bitch?: Nope. Despite all the cunty behavior from Cycle 4, Caris stayed out of it.

Entertaining?: Hahaha, not really. But she was one to root for, because you could see her trying.

Could she model?: Absolutely. One of the strongest girls in the cycle.

So, there’s that. I’m not going to be doing Canada, Britain or Brazil just because I don’t watch them enough to do what the deal was with the girls. Hope you enjoyed this waste of a Monday morning =)

Advertisements