Finally! FINALLY! Charlotte Dawson is in true form with that title post… a direct quote about Jessica having a great body but looking gross, facially speaking, in her photo. She’s obviously done better but this is a start and hopefully a sign of greater things to come.

The entire week was about swimwear. I did go against habit and watch the runway show that they participated in mostly because I was told that Amanda had a ridiculous body:

Sorry about the crappy quality… It’s just a screenshot from Youtube but CHRIST ON A CRACKER, flawless!!!

Anywho, Kimberly apparently started things off by refusing to wear a bikini in the bizarre teach they took part in prior to the Megan Gale swimwear show, which is what the screenshot is from. Seven of the nine girls got to walk– starting with Megan’s favorites: Joanna, Amanda, Jessica, Chantal, Kelsey, Brittney and last and probably least, Kimberly. This meant that Kathryn, yet again, didn’t get to participate in a catwalk challenge. She and Sophie had to help out back by taping shoes(?)

The photoshoot was also for Megan Gale swimwear and for some reason, the shots are all cropped quite strangely. The bottom two consisted of Kimberly, for her attitude and Chantal, for her picture. Kimberly survived her third bottom appearance and will survive for another week to provide drama for us.

Aaaand, onto the photos-

The only one that I found truly beautiful (and it looks better uncropped) belonged to


For the second week in a row, she’s delivered something absolutely flawless, and I like that they are completely different looks from her. I do worry about her though, seeing as how she probably has the smallest amount of boobage I’ve ever seen on a woman, and also the whole not ever getting to do a runway show thing can’t possibly be a good sign for her. Still.. perfect picture.

After Kathryn… I really can’t decide on the order for the rest of the shots. I do have a definitive least favorite but I’ll essentially just post commentary on the middle pictures based on the order the judges called them out in:


First impression of this was that it’s all a bit… convulsive? Like, she’s having a really fierce seizure or something? It’s grown on me though… I like the way her hair is flying around her and I think she’s managed a pretty cute facial expression in spite of such a wacky pose.


I find Kelsey to be really beautiful, both in person and in this picture. I like that she’s lengthened her body here and I think the intense gaze is sooo stunning. The pose, however, borders a little bit into that IS THIS HOT?! thing that drives me up the wall. The whole beachy textured hair probably saves it from going that way to me.


This loses something in the cropping and yes, it’s static and boring like everything else Brittney has ever taken but… it’s also very pretty and I think that sometimes boring is better suited for swimwear than a crazy and contorted pose. She shouldn’t have made it this far but at least she delivered something pretty.


People are really hating on her, probably because she looks like someone’s mom with her hair that just cannot be fixed. First, they trimmed her mullet and gave her… another mullet… Now she has like a Princess Diana crop. I don’t see what’s so wrong with the hair she has in this picture? I think this is pretty hot, honestly. The arms bother me but there’s something so blonde and beachy about it.


Already I’m looking at this and feeling that I’ve placed it too low. I love the curve of her body, although what the fuck was with photographing her in sandy water that makes her look like the cover model for Amputees Monthly? I just find that there’s something a little… aged about her face. She doesn’t look young and fresh… Although she doesn’t have the extremely pallid and disgusted reaction to the sun that I expected of someone kind of creepy looking like she is.


At this point, I think she’s going to win… The judges made a big deal out of how stiff she is and how she needs to relax which seems kind of like an attempt to mask that she’s so clearly the winner of this thing based on her look in person, Sarah’s orgasm over her incredible body and her consistently strong pictures. This isn’t my favorite shot but it’s good, (although better UNCROPPED! Bahhh) and I think the movement is nice and subtle.


Another shot that grows on me just looking at it, hahaha. Oh fuck.  The judges keep ‘gasming over her short hair but I think she literally does look like a little boy because of it. She looks soft… she looks pretty but it looks a little cheap (gasp) to me, probably because I just don’t buy this girl as a model. It’s so obvious that they’re keeping her around for the laffs and that she has no shot at this. If the Australian public wouldn’t vote for Cassi, they won’t for this bitch who won’t even wear a bikini.

And a definitive last place goes to-


You can still tell how pretty she really is, despite this awkwardly Facebook-y shot. I mean… really? THIS was the best she had? She has no sensuality whatsoever in this picture… If she did, I think it’d be lovely, what with the swinging hair and her gorgeous skin tone. But as it stands, this just sticks out like a sore crotch after a bikini wax.

I hope the next photos are um… easily to rank than this. On American standards, this was a decent photoshoot but I feel it’s the weakest of the Australian ones so far.